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I Hate Everything (one week a month)

I know it’s the week before my period when my favourite thing on earth—my beloved over-sized 3-year old kitten, George Michael, annoys the ABSOLUTE CRAP out of me. Unfortunately for him, the sound the creaky floorboards make in my new-old house as he innocently walks on them sounds just like the sound my couch makes when he is very deliberately destroying it. “STOP IT, GEORGE! … Continue reading I Hate Everything (one week a month)

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A Period of Dark Thoughts

***TRIGGER WARNING: Content about depression and suicidal thoughts, treated with humor and love*** Last week, as I was walking down St. Laurent in a “What even is Life” pandemic haze, it happened. I thought to myself, “Wouldn’t it be nice to just like, end my life and get away from all this misery?!” I know, alarm bells are going off for some of you, but … Continue reading A Period of Dark Thoughts

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Does an Artist have to Art?

Sooo… it’s been a weee little while *cough* 4 months…since I’ve posted here- in this magical place I created in February 2019 where I can express anything and everything. Read: rants about horrible ex-boyfriends, and all my annoyingly preachy “advice” on how to live your best life- which I generally break within the week, because I’m HUMAN. I started off strong, posting two epic over-shares … Continue reading Does an Artist have to Art?

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From Neighbors to Barn Cats

No sooner than I can write one underwhelming sentence, I hear an abominable noise emitting from beneath the deck floor. It’s unsettling, deeply obnoxious, and from multiple sources… like a group of defunct chain smokers are transmitting their low raspy voices through a hospital full of crying babies. I see four scrappy figures come into the light of day and lurch purposefully up the stairs. Two dark grey and two splotchy white with dark stripes- all ribs and claws and mucousy eyes. Continue reading From Neighbors to Barn Cats

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The Artist’s Cray

I have been putting off writing a new blog post for weeks. WEEKS. Well, what’s the problem Lauren?! Don’t you literally have nothing but free time right now? Honestly it feels like I’ve been snatched up from Tokyo and barfed out straight into the desert. I’m surrounded by sand- literally NOTHING is holding me back from accomplishing all the creative projects I’ve ever dreamed of. … Continue reading The Artist’s Cray

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The Infinite Beauty of Losing your Mind

I stand facing the bathroom mirror, head of a fresh Venus ladies razor in hand detached from it’s body. I don’t know if this will work; I’ve never done it before. I angle it toward my neck, take a deep breath, and start cutting. Clumps of dirty blonde hair fall into the sink and onto my sheep-shaped bath mat, as my cat watches judgmentally. You’re … Continue reading The Infinite Beauty of Losing your Mind

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Avoiding the Quarantine Crazies

Okay. So we are all starting to get used to this new, slower pace of life. But that doesn’t mean it’s getting easier. Sometimes I’ll think I’m actually starting to enjoy all this time to myself to relax and work on whatever project my heart desires, then within hours, I’m spiraling into a lonely self-pitying anxiety funk. I know I’m not alone in this, but … Continue reading Avoiding the Quarantine Crazies